Indian History
Indian History by a Schoolboy!!!
The original inhabitants of ancient India were called Adidases, who
lived intwo cities called Hariappa and Mujhe-na-Daro. These cities had
the best drain system in the world and so there was no brain drain from
them. Ancient India was full of myths which have been handed down from
son to father. A myth is a female moth. A collection of myths is called
mythology, which means stories with female caricatures.
One myth says that people in olden times worshipped monkeys because they
were our incestors. In olden times, there were two big families in
India. One was called the Pandava and the other was called the Karova.
They fought amongst themselves in a battle called Mahabharat, after
which India came to be known as Mera Bharat Mahan.
In midevil times, India was ruled by the Slave Dienasty. So named
because they all died a nasty death. Then came the Tughlaqs who shifted
their capital from Delhi because of its pollution. They were followed by
the Mowglis. The greatest Mowgli was Akbar because he extinguished
himself on the battlefield of Panipat which is in Hurryana. But his son
Jehangir was peace loving; he married one Hindu wife and kept 300
porcupines.
Then came Shahajahan who had 14 sons. Family planning had not been
invented at that time. He also built the Taj Mahal hotel for his wife
who now sleeps there. The king sent all his sons away to distant parts
of India because they started quarrelling. Dara Seiko was sent to UP,
Shaikh Bhakhtiyar was sent to J & K, while Orangezip came to Bombay
to fight Shivaji. However, after that they changed its name to Mumbai
because Shivaji's sena did not like it. They also do not like New Delhi,
so they are calling it Door Darshan.
After the Mowglis came Vasco the Gama. He was an exploder who was
circumcising India with a 100 foot clipper. Then came the British. They
brought with them many inventions such as cricket, tramtarts and steamed
railways. They were followed by the French who brought in French fries,
pizzazz and laundry. But Robert Clive drove them out when he deafened
Duplex who was out-membered since the British had the queen on their
side.
Eventually, the British came to overrule India because there was too
much diversity in our unity. The British overruled India for a long
period. They were great expotents and impotents. They started expoting
salt from India and impoting cloth. This was not liked by Mahatma Gandhi
who wanted to produce his own salt. This was called the Swedish moment.
During this moment, many people burnt their lion cloths in the street
and refused to wear anything else. The British became very angry at this
and stopped the production of Indian testiles.
In 1920, Mahatma Gandhi was married to one wife. Soon after he became
the father of the nation. In 1942, he started the Quiet India moment, so
named because the British were quietly lootoing our country. In 1947,
India became free and its people became freely loving. This increased
our population. Its government became a limited mockery, which means
people are allowed to take the law in their own hands with the help of
the police.
Our constipation is the best in the world because it says that no man
can be hanged twice for the same crime. It also says you cannot be put
in prison if you have not paid your taxis. Another important thing about
our constipation is that it can be changed. This is not possible with
the British constipation because it is not written on paper.
The Indian parlemint consists of two houses which are called lower and
higher. This is because one Mr. Honest Abe said that two houses divided
against itself cannot withstand. So Pandit Nehru asked the British for
freedom at midnight since the British were afraid of the dark. At
midnight, on August 15, there was a tryst in parlemint in which many
participated by wearing khaki and hosting the flag.
Recently in India, there have been a large number of scams and a plaque,
it can be dangerous because many people died of this plaque in Surat.
Scams are all over India. One of these was in Bihar where holy cows were
not given anything to eat by their elected leader. The other scam was
in Bofor which is a small town in Switzerland. In this, a lot of Indian
money was given to buy a gun which can shoot a coot.
Presently, India has a coalishun government made up of many parties,
left, right and centre. It has started to library the economy. This
means that there is now no need for a licence as the economy will be
driven by itself.
India is also trying to become an Asian tiger because its own tigers are
being poached. Another important event this year was the Shark Meeting
at Malas Dive. At this place, shark leaders agreed to share their
poverty, pollution and population.
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